I feel like my hermit crab trying to climb out of my cage. I climb the walls, bite the fence, sit on my house, do all that I can to try to escape, but I can't get out. I might get to the highest point in my cage, but when it comes down to it I'm still stuck; not able to exercise the ability of adventuring out.
I obliviously climb higher and higher. I think I'm getting somewhere, but then something happens to shake me off the walls. It makes me realize that I'm caged in.
I thought I gained the ability to wear my heart on my sleeve. I thought I grew up so I could tell people when I'm hurting. But instead of that, I realize that all I am capable of is the hypocrisy of pointing out your flaws.
I'm never moving forward. Just trying to push you ahead.
I mean well, honest.
I can not fix you.
But should i try?
How do I even try without making you feel judged?
I don't even want to try.
I have to get my own shit in order.
That's what you don't get. I'm just as fucked up as you are.
Lost, insecure, hurt, afraid.
And yeah, like you, I have absolutely no reason to be that way.
"Too many guys think I'm a concept, or I complete them, or I'm gonna make them alive. But I'm just a fucked-up girl who's lookin' for my own peace of mind; don't assign me yours." Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Yours until the pigs fly,
Alessondra Marie
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